Pain Like That is Fast And Its Rare..

Why is it that we always focus on the future and not the present? We are so busy focusing on the future we forget to live for the present and end up missing half our lives not realizing this. Even though I am not the most forgiving person, I think we should all forgive people easier.. I mean its not good to hold these grudges that waste our time, and our happiness. It is just a waste of energy to hold a grudge, and some people need more energy. Seriously, half the kids at my school are so dead during class they don't remember anything after class, or school. Then they go home and sleep, so energy is needed throughout our entire day. In my English class we had to read Touching Spirit Bear. I love to read but not when my teachers give me books usually, because they find the boring ones. Its their talent, I swear. But I really read this book, and I learned more about myself I think. Its not just a book about a boy who gets sent to an island by himself for a year because he bashed some kids head into the sidewalk. This boy, Cole, has to learn how to forgive and focus on the happy things in life. There is a part in the book where he is on the island the second time and he has to get in the freezing cold pond water with this Native American who is helping him get settled. The Native American, Edwin, teaches him how to focus on the good in life. He has a stick in the water with them as they float, and he tells him that his anger is on the left end and his happiness is on the right end. To get rid of his anger, he says break the left end off. But then he has Cole break it off again because its still there. Edwin then proceeds to tell him that you can never be rid of your anger, you just have to focus on the right end of the stick. Edwin also asks him to look into the sky and pay attention to whats going on, well Cole looks at the stormy clouds. While Edwin looks and sees the bright sun shining with joy. Edwin then tells Cole, he has to choose to focus on the sun because the clouds will keep him focusing on the bad in life more than the happy. That totally is amazing, that really taught me to focus on the good in life. Plus I read in a friend's blog on myspace about something Jay Leno said. It was really amazing, it was talking about how the Americans can be snobs and only focus on what we don't have, not what we do have. So, it mentions some examples like being able to live in a home even if its not a mansion. Being able to eat at a ton of restaurants that are different foods but its not enough. For some reason we want more. I am no angel, I always want what I don't have. I am happy that I have a car though, I mean I got pickier once we started looking into it more heavily, but I love my car. Sure a new car would be nice but I just needed a car to get me from point A to point B, and its what I got. I love it. I miss it when its gone too. I am grateful for my wonderful family who are so amazing, and supportive. I'm so glad we all get along really well. I love my friends, they always seem to be there for me when my life seems aweful. I live in a home that is a great shelter from the cold and everything else. I have food in the fridge every day, may not be what I crave that day but its still food. But I have realized I tend to focus on what I don't have more than what I do. Its a bad thing, I will work on it from now on. Another reason I decided that people should be more forgiving is because we could die at anytime. So, say you say bye to your mom when she drops you off for school. But you get a call saying she got in a car crash and died at the scene. Did you mention you love her to her? Did you ever say thank you? Did you say sorry after your fight the other day? Did you hug her and tell her she is the best and no one can replace her? I mean, people can die so easily these days, or something bad happens that ruins their health. For example, a girl on my drill team got in a car accident about two weeks ago I believe, T-boned by a semi, don't ask me how, I don't know details. But she was saved thank the lord, I thought she was getting better but since she hit her head. The wound wouldn't stop bleeding.. and she has rides everywhere, she is on pills in case of her having a seizure. Tonight at drill she had one and it was scary. My heart stopped, and I couldn't think of what she told us to do, luckily other drill girls remembered and she was okay.
I guess in conclusion, life really does come at you fast, if you aren't living in the present, you might miss a lot lo things, and then what if you died? What if you died from something so simple yet deadly and you were just gone? You didn't get to say goodbye, tell your neighbor if they sucked, ask the cute boy on a date, or say hi to that lonely kid in your 4A class? Its aweful knowing this, I hope this helps you as much as it has me. I think we should always tell the people who matter most to us, how much we love them and are grateful for them in our lives. Or just that one person who said hi to you when you were feeling down one day. Lets live for the present, not the future or the past.


btw- is this a blog that seems more deep? haha, i don't know. It feels like it.