Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Please Don't Tell Me That I'm The Only One Thats Vulnerable.


Why is it that we feel terrible when we lie, but yet if we told the truth everyone would know your life. I mean, I haven't been around for the longest time but I have my fair share of things I don't want anyone to know. Sure, one or two people know them but they aren't going to tell anyone. And when someone tells me their secrets I keep them. We lie to keep some things of our lives to ourselves. Like if we tell someone then its not just you anymore, there is someone out there who knows your secret. They could possibly get you with it too. I'm not sure why I started writing about this topic but I felt the need too. You want to tell someone something that happens to you but then you realize they could just tell one person too, and it ends up going and going in a big vicious circle. And soon without knowing it, what happened to you, isn't just between two people anymore. So to stop from telling other people, we'll lie. Add a cover story so no one will know besides you and someone else. Its a never ending cycle. Also, I've noticed people are afraid to admit who they really like because they are afraid of rejection. I am one of these people. I don't want to move on, and think someone else who is actually good for them can get a chance. Instead I end up being selfish in a way. Its not on purpose but it turns out that way it seems. I love how one person can say you like someone and yet its not true. Because the person you like is the one saying you like someone else. (if you don't understand, sorry) It makes me laugh. Its like you just want to scream the truth at them but you can't cause that leads to fear of rejection. Which I guess would end up helping you because instead of wasting time on someone you can't have, you could make time to think about what you're really after. Or you don't want to lose someone so much that you end up pushing them away. haha, life isn't very easy sometimes. I mean once you get the one you want, its a fairy tale at first. But then, things complicate your relationship up and it might end up getting worse than when you couldn't tell them you like them. I realize that relationships are extremely important. Its like beyond the world important. There is a sea of people, boys and girls, and we only meet 1/4 of them all. How do you know you ended up with the right one? Don't doubt your choice, but just think.. what if things had been different? You chose another road instead of the one you're on now. Crazy huh. Communication has to be the most important thing in a relationship, it seems. No experience to tell you of but from what I watch, and hear stories of. Its one of the most important. It seems we go for something we don't want so that the things we do want don't think we want them. haha, I know you might not understand but it makes perfect sense to me, say it slowly. haha. That always helps me when I don't understand sentences. Like, I want this one guy but he thinks I want someone else, which is what I want cause I don't want him to know I want him. Make sense? ahhaa. If not, sorry. Its how I speak. hahah, I don't know. I get so confused. I see people push away those who mean the most, and probably understood them the best because they can. Then once they are gone, they try to get them back and can't. I see people miss their chances because they are too scared to tell someone how they feel for the fear of the reaction. I mean, everyone sees this. We just never stop it.. I want too but I can't. So yeah. And why is it what means the most to us, like our fears and such, we can't tell anyone. So someone is afraid to be alone at night because they have had too many bad things happen to them, but they won't mention it, they'll wait for you to offer. Or when a girl wants a boy to just hug her and never let go, he has to realize it because she isn't going to say it. Or when you really want something so bad but you won't say it because it shows weakness. I think it comes down to being vulnerable. No one wants to be it, why because we feel so weak. Like we're naked and everyone can see what your true intentions are in life. They could see your soul, and you don't want them too. Its just crazy. I'm rambling now, well goodbye! :] Enjoy your day.

2 comments:

Walters Pride said...

that is deep chicka. I like reading your stuff. keep it up.

Walters Pride said...

did you see I am a fan of post secret on facebook? you should have ma buy the book and let me borrow it:)