OMG. I'm seriously ready to die right now. ;ajds fiuthqwedugshuafhddls a;tbuer[oitw. that helped.. oddly enough.
so last night, I was teaching without T and at 9:16-ish, I was ready to leave. I wanted to be out of there and forget it. So I stuck my Ipod Touch in my main compartment of my bag along with a not so well closed lid of my Gatorade. THE WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE!! I get home and see my bag is soaking wet. All I can think is f**k. I ransack my bag looking for only my Itouch, to see that it is okay. I find it after throwing everything around in my car, and it works. It is a bit wet but it still is on. Since its dying, I figure I should turn it off, save battery. NOOO! What the hell was I thinking??? Who let me think this?!! Then it won't turn on, go to the Apple store after a crap night and crap day at drill.. I have to make an appointment to fix my Itouch. REALLY? So then I come home and wait for my appointment. I go there and get someone to help me, want to know what they tell me?! ITS DEAD. And I can't transfer or do anything with all the stuff I had on there. MY LIFE WAS ON THAT! I had so much music and photos. And its just gone. Does the world really hate me that much? A lot of people had there Ipods turn back on and they were fine. Why not mine? Was I a terrible person to deserve losing my life on my Itouch? So now I'm trying to get the new Itouch to be the same as the old.. and no it isn't working. I have all the same applications just none of the information.. ahhhh. And my music is somewhere in my laptop and I'm suppose to find it. So this sucks. I'm really ready to die, cause I can't find any of my backed up songs. What the hell?! Ugh. I'm like crying my eyes out because my life is my music and now its all lost. I need to find it.. I have too. Or else, life will suck forever more.
So I had my Dare phone for a while. I enjoyed it but got annoyed, like all my phones. haha, So instead of a new one, I went back to my old red brick phone. Well I didn't do much with my Dare anymore, so then when a friend needed a phone for Verizon. I was like "oh yeah, use mine!" So then the friend took my phone like two weeks early, thinking she'll get it ready for herself. NOOO!!!!!! Hell to the mother no. WORST IDEA EVER. I wasn't thinking really and was being nice and just said "oh most of this can go." Then later, I think about it (days later) that I actually don't want any deleted. Guess what?! I'm too late, she's like "you said I could.. so I did." WHAT?! You really just deleted my things without a second or third opinion? WHY? Can I delete your history and not ask you if its okay...? Let me just erase your past and not care at all. I don't care if your past, or texts, or pictures, or anything meant anything to you. Screw you, its all me. And the only thing they saved, was the ringtones, so they could use them. REALLY?!! Wow. Deleted pictures, texts, videos... everything every f**king little thing. Do you even care that I actually want to remember my past and such? And I can't forgive you for that. Sorry is not a word I'm taking from you for this.. I resent you for it. And I hate seeing you use it. I can't stand to be around you. I want you to give it back now. Right now. And I don't tell you how I feel but I feel this way so strongly. I absolutely loathe seeing you use my old phone. I know that is rude and selfish of me, but its me. I get very selfish and have a hard time sharing. I'm sorry but it is me. I wish I would've made you just buy a new cheap phone. So f**k you. I"m mad at you and I will be for a very long time, I try to forgive you but I can't. Its beyond me to forgive you right now.
Not only did I give my Dare with memories away, but it is the only phone to have survived still living. I saved it before I destroyed but then I give it to a friend and they destroy it. WHY DID I DO THIS? All my other phones and electronics always die and I can never retrieve memory or anything from them. My Dare had that and I ruined it. I'm stupid.
And I'm sick of this whole pity me thing, I feel like I'm the bad guy in the movie. Like the one girl who her best friend gets more attention cause she has a depressing life.. and I feel bad cause I want the attention back. It was my life before yours, give it back. It was my family, give it back. Stop stealing everything of mine just cause you have nothing!!! ugh.
So losing my stuff from my Dare cause a friend doesn't consider my feelings, losing my Ipod Touch, and not being able to find my music. Oh plus I'm basically mentally screwed up right now. My brain isn't right, and I can tell. Something is wrong and I'm acting weird. So life sucks at the minute and sorry I freaked out but I'm having a nervous breakdown and I don't deal well. :/ I really need help..
I just want my music back.. I want my memories back. I want it all back and there is no rewind button!
